Handle Overwhelm With These Three Tips
Manage overwhelm this New Year with strategies for relief.
It’s a brand new year! Fireworks, parties, days off from work, New Year’s Resolutions; you can read about my opinion on those here. So much excitement! And yet, so much overwhelm lurking just beneath the surface.
Happy Hogmanay! Happy New Year!
But what if New Year’s secretly stirs up anxious feelings of overwhelm for you? The worry that the initial motivation and willingness to get it all done, peters out come February 1. Okay, for some of us, come January 3. Um, yeah, I’m in that group.
New Year’s: A set up for Overwhelm?
While everyone else may seem full of New Year enthusiasm, today I want to offer you three ways to handle overwhelm, so you don’t go down the rabbit hole, or if you do, you can come back out quickly.
The Trap: “I have to…..”
Punxsutawney Phil sees his shadow and you hear 6 more weeks of winter, and if you’re like me, you want to hibernate all your “have to’s” ASAP.
Winter can be a time for nesting at home. We can take time to learn a new language, organize our closets, catch up on reading and enjoy winter sports. Or – race to the nearby hospital for stitches…as we did, one year, on our first family ice skating escapade.
I had just gotten divorced, and I thought “I have to show everyone that my little boys and I are fine. The three of us will manage better than ever…even if I have to make us have fun!”
On the ice at the local indoor ice rink were Me (Mama), Tyryn and Skylyr: ages 6 and 4. I had ice skated a scant handful of times. The boys, never. I paid for and watched my kids skate in a half-hour beginner class first. Then we were off in exhilaration on our own!
Five minutes in, I was wrapping one baby blue legging round Ty-Ty in an attempt to staunch the blood, generously flowing like wine, from the gash in his forehead.
We three raced in my car to the hospital for stitches. Tyryn bears the scar just above his eyebrow.
Imagine playing in the background…“You’ve got to change your evil ways,” by Santana
Gym memberships surge to record high sales, and the motivation to get in shape, lose weight, get healthy, get a new job, grow your business, ” become a better you…become someone else…the list goes on and on…
How to handle overwhelm tips:
1. Take it one “whelm” at a time
As you feel the panic start because you have a To Do list longer than your allotted time on earth…take it one overwhelm or “whelm” at a time.
Honestly, I actually say to myself, “Take it one whelm at a time.” It helps me focus my energy and actually figure out what is important at this very moment.
2. Avoid The Trap of “I have to…”
Instead, practice catching yourself every time you say or think to yourself, “I have to _______.” and change it to, “I choose to.” It makes a world of difference for our mindset, how we feel and our ability to take action.
3. Create support
Most of us have too much stuff, too much to do, too many “have to’s” and a myth we should be able to get organized on our own. Says who?
Try engaging a supportive friend or support group as you climb out of overwhelm.
Hire a professional. Jessika Toothman sheds light about professional organizers and hiring one, in her article, “How Professional Organizers Work: When Should You Hire One?”
Contrary to what some people may think, even the ones hiring me, you don’t have to do things on your own, especially getting organized. In fact I believe, unless organizing is your passion or area of genius, it’s much wiser to hire help.
Having support from a professional organizer who is able to think you out of the Overwhelm Box will give you relief and lifelong knowledge of how you can manage overwhelm when it happens.
Your turn now! I want to hear what brings on that feeling of overwhelm for you? What have you found helpful when you feel overwhelmed?
In deep gratitude; I love helping you and others one whelm at a time!
XOX,
a down-to-earth approach to ringing in the new year! (and i love your advice to “take it one ‘whelm’ at a time,” juls. haha) so so important to change “i have to” to “i choose to.” feeling as if you are in charge of your own life – CHOOSING what you will and will not do – creates greater momentum towards accomplishing your dreams and goals.
I wholeheartedly agree April! Choosing keeps us moving through fear, resentment and worry. It gives us back our power which we sometimes misplace.
AWESOME post, Jul’s!! I love everything you said. I love your use of “whelm”, a lot! Your suggestion to switch to “I CHOOSE to” is perfect and immediately helpful, so thank you for that! The main thing I do to get out of overwhelm is to take a quick accounting of what I can control and what I can’t. Once I have my “can’s” in order, I figure out what I have control of today. If there’s nothing I can do about it today, I let it go. This helps me actually accomplish the achievable “whelms” while reducing them the next day. 🙂
April, your comment has me smiling that my post gave you something to act on immediately. What a great way to handle overwhelm…quick accounting of what one can and cannot control. Love it. Especially letting go of what one can’t control. This method really switches one from overwhelm paralysis to simple action!
Amen to this 2. “practice catching yourself every time you say or think to yourself, “I have to _______.” and change it to, “I choose to.”
Doing that really has made the world of difference in my life. We always have freedom to choose and remembering that some how makes it easier to make a choice that really works for me (rather than one I ‘should’ make!). Even if there are consequences to choosing against what I (or others) feel ‘should’ be done or needs to be done, it’s so powerful to know that I’m the one who gets to choose.
Thanks so much for the reminder Jul’s.
From your comment Ferris and others here, I can see that the change up of self talk from “I have to…” to I CHOOSE…” has had the biggest impact. I know it really refocuses me, when I catch my old habit of “I must”, “I have to”, “I should” and gently change that to “I choose…” it is like hitting a reset button and I can change a though and go from there!
I love ‘take it one whelm at a time’. And I also need to ditch the ‘I have to, I should have and why didn’t I? Great tips, Jul’s.
I am thrilled you found my tips helpful! It is indeed amazing how often we tell ourselves, “I have to, I should, I must…” Glad you are choosing to join me on my side of the street!
These are all great tips and I learned what Hogmanay is!!
Indeed! Scot’s New Year, essentially!
Lovely! I feel better already! Along the line of “I have to” I recently read “anything that comes after “I should” is never good. It is judgment and guilt all wrapped up in two little words. Thank you for these great tips.
Thank you so much for your comment! I totally agree, “I have to” “I should” are prisons awaiting us if we let them ensnare our mindset. I practice being gentle with myself and offer this method to others when I invoke this unconscious habit of mind chatter. I hear myself think the thought, stop and simply notice my self-talk. Then I breathe as I switch the thought to “I choose to.”